Shawshank Sunshine and Rainbows

Spoiler alert. I finally watched The Shawshank Redemption. (Do I really have to give a spoiler alert for a film that's 20 years old?). But seriously, if you haven't seen the movie, don't read this post. Just don't do it. It's a fabulous film; you owe it to yourself to watch it with a clear mind. 

I'm serious. 

Don't read this post if you haven't seen the movie. I'm about to ruin it for you. 

You understand? 

Okay. 

Stop reading now. 

I avoided The Shawshank Redemption for years. When it was released in 1994, I was barely 17 years old--just old enough to legally see a rated "R" film, but not quite old enough to tell my parents I wanted to watch a rated "R" film. I led a sheltered life. Really sheltered. I went to a little Lutheran school where sex ed was taught by way of a little cartoon book entitled "How You Got to Be You--God's Plan." Seventh grade at public school was nearly death by embarrassment and humiliation. As for prison, punishment, and penalties? I knew that some kids had to go to traffic court for speeding tickets, but that if I had to go to traffic court for a speeding ticket, I could kiss the keys to my classic coupe goodbye. 

My favorite movies in 1994 ranged from The Little Mermaid to anything starring John Candy. (Who am I kidding? I still love Summer Rental, and The Great Outdoors will always be one fine piece of cinema in my opinion.). In the 8th grade, my bestie and I walked from my house to Hastings to rent Airplane! right before we flew to Washington D.C. We felt really naughty. It was rated PG. 

So, I missed The Shawshank Redemption when it hit theaters. I missed it on VHS and then again on DVD. At some point, it became the Shawshank Challenge. How long could I shelter myself from seeing this highly acclaimed prison film that was sure to be a tear jerker? I avoided it as long as I could--until curiosity and a down-turned mood finally got me. 

I volunteer about once a month at a legal clinic. Our clients have some sad stories. Last week, a young woman visited for advice. She was about 23 years old, and but for the braces that my parents gifted to an eighth grade girl's smile (thanks mom and dad), she could have been me--at least from an initial impression. Her case details shattered the sunshiney rainbow that I've learned follows me everywhere. She was visibly pregnant. She has two other children by two different fathers. She lives with "an older gentleman" who "wants to help her and pays her rent." She has not seen her 6 year old daughter in 4 years. She has no income and survives on the kindness of others. I later learned that the young woman had been shuffled through the foster care system for 9 years before she was adopted--and those years took their toll on her. She leads a rough life, and I wonder about her future and her children's. She made me wish I had won the lottery so that I could build a family shelter, feed her children, send her to school, and try to make a difference other than giving what turned out to be useless legal advice. 

This young woman's story made me gasp, "I used to think I was kind of worldly. I'm not! Sunshine and rainbows follow me everywhere!" 

I was in a funk, and I wanted a movie that would match my mood. So, after years of avoidance, I turned on Shawshank. I put the iPad in the pantry and got to work. (I don't have the attention span for movies--I have to work while I watch--my pantry is amazing right now, by the way.). Somewhere between Andy getting busy living instead of getting busy dying and Red not giving a sh*t about his parole, I was hooked. 

Brooks died. It was to be expected. This was a heartbreaker of a film, right? 

Then, they found the hole in Andy's wall. I watched, waiting for the guards to run him down, or for Red to be tortured for information. 

Red got out. I sorted cake mixes with tears in my eyes, waiting for the inevitable farewell to Red. 

But wait? What's this? There's money under a rock? Please Red, get on the bus!

Still, I waited. Surely I hadn't avoided a sunshiney, feel good prison break movie for 20 years?! It's not possible. And then it was. There they were. Sun on their faces, and nothing but clear blue skies and ocean waves. (Caveat: it's not all sunshine and rainbows--there's some pretty serious business in that movie; my tender preteen mind is still reeling.). 

Sunshine, rainbows. They found me again, and after a rough day. Sometimes, I feel like I'm a pre-teen girl. I just haven't grown up enough to really appreciate fine literature and films. Most critically acclaimed movies go unwatched (except Frozen, because, you know, Gigi). After my Shawshank sunshine, I think I'm going to revisit my personal film philosophy; and, in the meantime, you can find me snuggled in bed late at night just waiting for the moment when Andy sees Red on that beach.